Confessions of a Musicianary
It's been hard to find this year. After eight months we've come to a place where Eric and I are alone. To be honest it's been somewhat of a surprise. This year began with the challenge of going from house to house. Most often the houses of those we had just met as we drove up their driveway with our suitcases and our smiles. As people who aren't exactly the most extroverted, it was a little out of our comfort zones. But as the days went on it became more normal. Don't get me wrong, every home we spent time in from the very beginning was filled with the most lovely people. We loved getting to know each person and family. But sometimes it takes a while to get used to a new normal. The many people we stayed with welcomed us into their homes and made us feel like family, like we belonged there, even if it was just for a night. Through their example shined the gift of hospitality. We saw Jesus through the many who opened their doors. We have made new friends. We will be forever thankful.
After not having a place where we are by ourselves for eight months, we looked forward to being on our own. Yet, when we sat next to each other on the couch after unpacking the heavily laden car, we looked at each other and both thought the place so silent! Where are the people? So strange... Don't get me wrong, Eric and I aren't just husband and wife, we are best friends. We love being together, hanging out, working together in music ministry. It has strengthened our marriage in a way no other experience thus far has. And yet, it felt all of a sudden, that we were all alone, together, with no community.
As a travelling musician, it can be a challenge. Being in a different church every week. In actual fact I don't think we've been to the same church two weeks in a row for over a year now. It can be difficult to not have that immediate presence of physical community. God has blessed us with some amazing friends. Friends that understand this life, because they themselves are in the same ministry. We are so thankful that God has put them into our lives. But when you are travelling they aren't always close. I am thankful that Eric and I are able to do this together. To go through the same things. A life that is very different from the 'fortnight-pay-cheque' jobs we've had in the past.
But what I am most thankful for is that we have God.
We have Jesus.
That we can know and trust that the Holy Spirit guides us in our daily lives.
This thought is what gives us rest. It gives us peace. While touring, our concerts have been mostly based around the rest that Jesus offers us in Matthew 11:28-30. They have been focused on trusting that Jesus can take our burdens in life and replace them with His peace. Doing these concerts has been a continual reminder to us to live what we sing. It's not always easy. It's much easier to slip back into the complacency of trusting in myself to fix my own worries and plans. But even when I doubt, I know that Jesus is there. Just waiting for me to let Him lead me in my life. When we trust Him. When we let Him guide our paths. This is when true rest is revealed. True peace that can only come from one source. Jesus.
You know, the most amazing thing happened. After only a day, of silence, of being just us, God blessed us with a song or two. The first songs we have been able to finish in over seven months!
It can be difficult.
But it's amazing how God can give you rest in the busy, the noisy, the scattered, and the silent times of life.